Hades in Baltimore

Yes, it’s that time of year. The city has turned into a rainforest greenhouse. So it’s only right that I take a long bike ride during some vacay time. I was in Wildwood, NJ. and decided to ride to Atlantic City, NJ. A mere 67 miles—–but took the longer way home and made it 85 miles. Oh, did I mention it was 99 degrees. Here’s a monument of “Civil War Soldiers and Sailors,” along with my bike friday and my new best friend—my Carradice saddlebag. Who looks better? The monument or my Friday?








Continuing my ride back, I passed by a giant elephant “Lucy The Elephant,” who I thought was just a weird way for the City of Margate to express their love wholly mammoths.

But as is usually the case, little do Alonzo know.

So there…….meanwhile back at work somebody took my pic as I was “sounding intelligent” during a Student Activities Fair. We’re actually talking bicycle rides, which (lemme tell ya) is a lot more fun than talking medical school business. I’ve also been working on some video skits for Johns Hopkins Eisenhower Library.










And to wind things up, here’s a small taste of my (almost finished) play “B-Side Man”……(it’s all about my life, but you’ll get that pretty quick).

“I didn’t want normal. Normal? Normal? I watched my friends go normal. Blah on Normal. If I wanted Normal, I wouldn’t have been an UNEMPLOYED 35 YEARS OLD LIVING AT HOME WHEN MY DAD  CAUGHT ME IN THE BATHTUB WITH A 16 YR. OLD. Taboo? No. Ta-Boo-Boo.………(Pause)

My friends said going to school in Vermont would take me outta blackness. Wouldn’t know my culture, my people, yakkety-yak……I never had a problem with nobody’s blackness, especially my own, and I didn’t think fresh geography would change my perspective. I thought me being a little city with a dose of country let me breathe some fresh air.

Matter of fact, being of two worlds had advantages. During freshman year I got a ride home for Thanksgiving break. We hadda drop off a couple other students. We came outta the Green Mountains, through New York, parts of Jersey, Philly and by the time we hit Baltimore I thought—–this is some URBAN-ASS LANDSCAPE. I mean, coming outta this pristine, nature-filled, ROBUST land of maple syrup—back to Baltimore—-I almost said “keep driving”.  That first trip back I felt like black people were living in concentration camps. The whole east coast felt like a ghetto. Trains ran through ‘em, buses ran in ‘em, Alonzo wanted to run from ‘em. But who was I? What was I? I started to merge a little of both worlds. Brought some up-north devil-may-care to Baltimore, took back some racial ID to Vermont.

(We now her party sounds)

In B’Mo I now went to parties. Asked pretty women to dance. I was a full-blown Artiste who was time and a half for local office girlies, they mighta had jobs—but I had ideas and vo-cab-bu-lary. A visiting scholar in my own town. Back then women were impressed with men of arts and letters. It was a break from the 9-to-5 caramel Endicotts who were rushing to get MBA’s that were already useless. Brothers  in my neighborhood were always trying to land pretty women. And oh how they struggled. Stared women down. Drove impressive rides. Wore candy-colored suits. When everybody thinks they got the best dick on the planet, nobody does. Alonzo used…………..conversation. Is there anything more dangerous?”

Hey, it’s (as they used to say) “all the way live”.